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How Can I Love My Hateful Children?

Updated 02-Aug-2019 - First Published 02-Aug-2019 by Debi Douglas

It's a tough situation if your own children are hateful and spiteful towards you and deliberately set out to cause you upset and pain. You may find yourself asking what you did to deserve such difficult and unlikeable children.

However, you are in control of your own thoughts, feelings, behaviors and actions. You cannot let your children determine how you feel.

Further you need to be able to understand your children's world and what may be going on internally for them.

Difficult family dynamics may have caused your children to experience their own pain. Their pain may not be obvious to you.

Your children need to express how they feel and be able to open up about their feelings. Sometimes it's hard to be the adult when we're experiencing our own problems. But that said, setting an example for your children to follow is vital to their emotional well-being and future success.

Allowing children to express themselves in a safe, warm and non-reprimanding atmosphere will allow children to feel understood. In safe surroundings, the possibility of children behaving badly in order to be heard, is minimised.


Debi Douglas
Licensed Mental Health Counselor Florida
Qualified Supervisor

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In case of emergency, call 911, or call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255, or your local hospital.

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Although Debi is a qualified Christian therapist, please know that whatever your beliefs, in her practice, everyone is warmly welcomed.

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